Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Am I Content?

I have struggled with being content because I focus more on what I don't have than what I do. I justify my longings because I feel that "normal people" have the things I desire. I speak to my heart lies that suggest that I deserve the basic things in life that all people enjoy and have opportunity to enjoy. I get bitter when I see people gain simple things, simply, when I have to work hard to achieve simple things. It is in this place of brokenness I find comfort in these words from Proverbs:

"Remove from me vanity and lies; give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with food convenient for me: lest I be full and deny Thee, and say, Who is the Lord? or lest I be poor, and steal, and take the name of my God in vain." ~ Proverbs 30:8-9

I desire deeply to have the vanity and lies removed. What an amazing prayer, and an amazing gift to receive. As one who has not received it, I will continue to pray.

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